October 30, 2008

#45 Sexposé

It's no secret that Malaysian people are more reserved and reticent when it comes to matters involving sex. In fact, Malaysia ranks as one of the least developed countries when it comes to sexual experiences and education.

On paper, it seems that Malaysian people are uptight and sexually unadventurous. This is where they have you fooled. Malaysian people love sex and its intimate intricacies as much as the next person. They're just more coy about it. It's amusing but it's part of the Malaysian hypocrisy that passes itself off as allure and mystery. Yesterday's mystery however, quickly turns into tomorrow's history.

A cursory scan of the internet will reveal that Malaysian people are not quite the prudes you thought they were. Sex scandals, from politicians to math geniuses to professional foosball players are quickly becoming commonplace. Due to an exhibitionist (and opportunist) streak that strikes the once sexually repressed, home videos and illicit images are making their way onto the internet and DVD collections. What better way to make one's introduction to Malaysian society than to go down in infamy and be the purveyor of pleasure to thousands? Some of these sexhibitions would even put Paris Hilton to shame. Not that she would feel any, but you catch my drift.

These sexperiences that have become ice breakers and water cooler talk also allow us to examine public perception with regard to gender equality. While the male protagonists of such sexploits suffer temporary embarrassment, their virile displays are secretly the envy of Malaysian men and pique the curiousity of the fairer sex. However,the females depicted in these displays of debauchery receive stern admonishment and societal shunning. So you see, being screwed takes on more than just a literal meaning.

This teaches us three very valuable lessons:

1. Protect yourself, because the penis mightier than the sword.

2. Always decline requests to star in amateur productions. 15 minutes of shame doesn't really count as acting experience.

3. Be a sex object. When asked for sex, object.

13 comments:

Ashleigh said...

Yes!! I totally agree with #1-#3!

B.H. said...

Ashleigh,

Thanks for saving this post from the ignominy of going commentless. Make sure you pass the word around about #1-#3.

B.H.

Thevan said...

its really a wonder why u get so lil comments. really, tak paham knapa!

neways, if u've been following gutteruncensored u'd prolly notice there's been anotha 'sexpose' on a m'sian babe. kekeke, thot u might wanna know, if u havent already.

p.s. i'm a fan of yur work.

B.H. said...

Thevan,

Thank you for the support and the information. I suppose I could say this blog's readers constitute quality, not quantity?

B.H.

Aidan said...

WTF. Char dou. No balls to leave names also. T_T

B.H. said...

Anonymous 10:49am,

Thank you for your response. My next post will be on bigotry and cowardice.

Aidan,

Thank you. I can always count on you to be a ball buster.

B.H.

Ashleigh said...

Looks like Anonymous totally didn't get the whole idea of your blog. Sigh... The ignorance of our countrymen.

Miss Lime said...

Funny one, my fellow comrade.

B.H. said...

Ashleigh,

If all our countrymen were of the same mindset, we wouldn't have much to make fun of anymore on this blog now would we?

Comrade Lime,

Your appreciation is noted, now let us preach to the rest of the sheep.

Melorina said...

I like your sexpose posting!! Kinda like the dry humor. I am sorry that some people could not get it!! Keep up the good work!!

I wonder why Malaysian could not be a sex object like Europeans? Besides ever wonder why the 'mat salleh' hugging all the malaysian girls at bangsar or bukit bintang?? I doubt all of those huggings are platonic
: ). Of course it is not limited to Malaysia alone - all parts of the world. Sex is definitely a hot topic with a lot of people : )

Ara said...

Typical malaysians of avoiding sex topic there (anonymous person)..haha..prude!

Oh well, when u see our dear, used-to-be-uber-shy Malaysian girls get all naked and horny on Youtube and Myspace, you'd probably think that they can act in porn even better than those minah sallehs! ;-D ini kisah benar..I think so.. huhu~ Malaysia Boleh!

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k said...

OMG I LAUGHED SO HARD AT #3.... that is such a malaysian joke, one that I miss... by 2 years apparently. ANYWAY. I fell off my bed. thanks.