June 18, 2008

#4 Caucasians

In Malaysia, Caucasians hold a mythic, almost divine status among the locals. The exact reason for such idolatry could be attributed to the country's former status as a British colony, the charms of western influence or it could just be the favourable exchange rate.

Whatever it is, Caucasians know for a fact that they could be white trash or social pariahs wherever they are from but once reaching Malaysian shores, they are treated like royalty. Most Malaysians are dumbstruck when encountering a "kwailo" or "mat salleh" (colloquial terms for white man) and will go out of their way to accommodate them. The white man's origins, occupation or even appearance are not a matter of concern to the average Malaysian. To them, if you're all white you're all right.

For these reasons, Caucasians the world over flock to Malaysia (ASEAN neighbours Thailand, Singapore, etc. share the same fondness for white people) on vacation or to retire to take advantage of this white fever. Caucasians can be seen in places such as Heritage Row, Bangsar, Langkawi Island, Ampang, Hartamas and other affluent areas in Malaysia.

It is very common to see a white man dating a Malaysian female. Curiously enough, all standards and demands which a Malaysian female normally applies to the Malaysian male do not apply to white men. He is not expected to treat her like a living goddess or pay for everything when they are together. When dating a white man, the Malaysian female becomes more independent, emotionally and financially.

However the same cannot be said of the white female and Malaysian male. Such a union is unheard of and there would be catastrophic repercussions on a genealogy level if this should ever occur. The only recorded incident in modern history of an asian male-white female pairing would be Bruce Lee (not Malaysian though) and his wife Linda.

The effect white people have on Malaysians is uncanny; smiles form on reticent faces, unnatural accents develop and manners improve dramatically. This contrasts sharply with treatment of fellow Malaysians which is lukewarm at best.

Some Malaysians wish nothing but to emulate their Caucasian counterparts and even go so far as to lead pseudo-white lives, eschewing everything Malaysian despite their inherent background and culture. These Malaysians are primarily found in Kuala Lumpur (Malaysia's capital).


fie the elf said...

However the same cannot be said of the white female and Malaysian male.

LOL are you kidding me.

s kim said...

haha that fie the elf girl is right.

LOVE the blog btw haha
malaysians truly are rare breed of the human species that behave like no other.
i wrote a post on Kuching ppl btw haha. it's tres entertaining.
do read it here

shameless plug i know. but rest assured it's worth it.

keep up e satire! haha

*p.s. i'm linking you.

B.H. said...

Hi Kim,

Much obliged. It is readers like you that give this blog a reason to pursue pejoration.

Nice blog post btw.

"Here's my card."

L.I. Ang said...

aiyo.. both my cousin brothers are married to white women. how's that?

KittyCat said...

Spot on post. I wonder why we're so nice to them?

Especially when many of them are really nothing to shout about in their home countries...

At least the mainland Chinese knows that they are only useful for learning English!

Wanna exchange links?

B.H. said...

Hi Kittycat,

First of all, thanks for visiting the site and leaving your comments which are most well received. Are you sure you are not in MLTR denial?

The site administrators have yet to define their policy on linking sites. As such, I am afraid we can't be reciprocal of your link as yet. We would most appreciate if you did link our site but extend our humble apologies that we can't return the favor forthrightly. We will notfiy you once our policies regarding linkage are established.

Thanks once again for your patronage and we hope you continue to support Malaysianisms!

Alvin said...

correct correct correct!!

good to see white trash gets recycled here in Malaysia truly Asia!!..

lily said...

Love the blog,

but that thing you wrote about white women and asian men...

-have met a good number of eurasians with asian surnames...

plus, it's fashionable to have an asian boyfriend in various european cities -paris being the prime example.

B.H. said...

Hi Lily,

I'm glad you like the blog. This further proves my theory that the fairer sex are more discerning when it comes to their choice of reading material.

Well, the fact that it is "fashionable" suggests that it is a fad, trend or a novelty.

But I do appreciate your observational contribution.

Come back soon!


Anonymous said...

This entry reminds me of a youtube video, entitled "yellow fever".

cb said...

my father is malaysian and my mother is caucasian. it's not common but not impossible either.

fumbucker said...

Maybe they have bigger dicks.

Btw,my uncle is married to a white womAn.So shocking,it's hardly ever heard of.I need to add this though,a lot of people confuse her with Willie Nelson.

Tasneem Najeeb said...

i totaly agree with you on this, check out mu blog on that matter at http://ntasneem.blogspot.com/2011/11/why-do-malaysians-love-white-mixed.html

or just go to http://ntasneem.blogspot.com


Anonymous said...

well white woman dont want little asian penis and white men want to experiment with little asian vagina.

Anonymous said...

white women dont want little asian penis's because their vagina's are too big for such a small penis's and white men want to experiment their big penis's on small asian vagina just to hear an asian woman scream and moan because of the wideness and length of their penis's which are too big for an asian women to handle.

Chasity Resurreccion said...

I am white and im married to an asian man. I see a lot of this in the states. I stumbled on your site because I was nervous about leaving the states and how I would be reacted to here. I lol'd a few times and I dont think I was treated any different than the rest so far but I havnt left the hotel so we shall c. But I treat asain better than white mostly due to my serious case of Yellow Fever lol I like u guys better than americans. Thanks for the giggles :)

primepeng said...

Lol must be the only two couples of am/wf I saw shopping in sunway pyramid. I never encounter beyond that though. When I shop at pavilion, garden hotel, and midvalley, I saw wm/af couple only and there are dozens of them. Am lose wm gains. Oh well.

Rich said...

"Fashionable to have an asian boyfriend in Paris"... LOL!!

Rich said...

"Fashionable to have an asian boyfriend in Paris"... LOL!!